When you turn eighteen you are expected to make a lot of life changing choices. Maybe you’ll go to a university or into the trades, maybe you’ll take time for yourself or for travel. You are now considered an adult so you can vote, smoke, and join the military. When I graduated high school, I felt the weight of expectations crushing me. I know this is not a unique feeling but at the time it feels like you are the only one dealing with these pressures. I still felt like a child who had no clue what choices to make or what I wanted my future to look like.
There was never a time in my life where I thought I wouldn’t go to college. My parents had never gone and desperately wanted me to fulfill this dream that they didn’t get to pursue. When I got to college, I, like many others, had no clue what was going on or what I was going to do. I declared myself as undecided and took classes that sounded interesting, with the hope of having an epiphany moment of knowing what I’m gonna do with my life.
During my first semester, I took a geography course where I was introduced to physical science, cartography, and the many functions of geographic thinking. I was so intrigued by geography that I decided to declare it as my major. As the next few semesters passed I learned a lot about climate, mapping, geographic information processes, as well as how defeating college was. My major was male dominated and incredibly discouraging, I didn’t feel supported by my peers or professors. These feelings caused intense doubt and self-reflection.
By the end of my second year I had decided to change my major to education. I had always loved children and learning so I thought maybe I could use my new found love of science to become a science teacher. I chose to pursue this path for another year before ultimately changing my path again.
I felt so embarrassed for not being able to choose and feared that there was no correct choice. Finally, I decided to take a break from school. I took a semester off because I felt so lost. During that time, I thought about what I liked to do, what my passions were, and what careers I could see myself pursuing. I had thought about the happiness I felt when travelling and visiting National Parks. Maybe I could work in conservation? With the realization of wanting to serve the environment, I brainstormed what majors or minors I could pursue. By this time, I had taken many geography, geology, and sociology courses, thanks to my multiple major changes. I decided to pursue a multidisciplinary degree with focuses in those three disciplines.
When I graduated in May I had similar feelings of loss, confusion, and doubt, as I was now entering the “real world” with yet again, no idea what I was doing. When I spoke with Jill and Tara about the environmental education position at Green Mountain I got really excited but still felt doubt. Even after accepting the position I feared I wasn’t qualified or that I might not make a great fit. However, I have now been serving with Green Mountain for a over a month and have felt a great weight lifted off of me.
After supporting my first education program and learning to do river testing, I felt so excited about my future and my choice to serve. I always had a fear that no matter the career it was impossible to have fun with it. Now I am hopeful about my future and I can’t wait to learn more during my service at Green Mountain.
Grace is a full-year member serving at Green Mountain Conservation Group as the Education and Outreach Assistant. You can learn more about Grace here!