As an educator, it’s difficult not to get emotionally invested in the successes or failures of your programs. As I sat in front of my computer ten minutes before my first Nature Story and Discovery Time program was supposed to start, the hope that I might see a name pop up in the Zoom waiting room slowly faded. As the clock ticked towards 10:30, then 10:35, that initial hope settled like a stone into disappointed acceptance that no one was coming. I had written a press release for the local newspaper, advertised on our website and our Facebook page, even contacted seven local libraries to ask for their support in advertising, and yet, no children showed up. I felt a bit defeated, wondering if this disappointment would repeat itself for the next eleven weeks of my twelve week program. Our Education Coordinator, Tara Schroeder, lightened the mood by reminding me that new programs are hard to get off the ground. She had hosted programs with guest speakers where no one showed up! But as I walked back to my desk I felt embarrassment wrap around my shoulders. No one showed up.
When I first proposed an online story time for young children to Tara, I was envisioning recording readings of nature themed stories to put on our YouTube channel. I wasn’t trying to plan anything overly involved or long term, just another series of educational videos to film in my spare time. I should have anticipated that Tara would supply an abundance of resources and experience, turning a casual idea into a full fledged program concept in one twenty minute conversation! I could sense my excitement and trepidation growing, the anticipation of fun educational experiences with young children mingled with the fear that an online platform wouldn’t be adequate, or that the community wouldn’t be interested. I had felt content to keep this project in the emotionally safe realm of pre-recorded content, but after going over the possibilities with Tara, I could see this program coming to life, and it needed live participation.
After my first no show meeting, I started advertising harder. I recontacted the local libraries and started sharing the meeting information on my social media. I reconnected with old teachers and friends who were excited to help me promote the program. For my second meeting I had six children join me to learn about winter animal tracks! The following week we had five children learning about hermit crabs with us. As I demonstrated how they should act out the movements of sea creatures with me, I felt a pang of frustration that I couldn’t do this in person with them, but it was quickly swept away as I watched them swaying like anemones and scuttling like crabs. When I attempted a craft for our owl week, I was nervous the parents wouldn’t see my request that their child have a toilet paper tube and decorating supplies. In the online format, I couldn’t be sure the children would have all the supplies they needed to follow along. Thankfully, all seven children had toilet paper tubes that they successfully transformed into owls, with calls that varied a bit from the three local owls we had learned about.
The educational programming I’ve done in the past has been as a camp counselor or as a naturalist. It was almost assured I'd have participants, and I never had to navigate an online format. Creating a program from scratch has made me feel far more vulnerable, but each time a child asks a poignant question or shares an opinion, it feels exhilarating. Each meeting since the first, I’ve come away feeling energized and thrilled that the children responded well. After each meeting I’m better able to identify what works online and what doesn’t. There is still that nervous anxiety as I wait for children to enter the Zoom waiting room, but I’ve come to know some returning children and connect with them despite the online format. I’ve come to embrace that good education necessitates an emotional investment, because if we don’t care when we fail, we won’t care when we succeed either, and students need teachers that care.
EB is the Education and Outreach assistant at Green Mountain Conservation Group, and has recently been designing an interpretive trail with fellow LRCC member Trent. Learn more about EB here!